I was bullied. Yes, as a child, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m referring to last week. I was bullied just last week! It took me off guard and hurt my feelings right when I thought I had the sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bones-but-names-will never-hurt-me theory under control.

So why am I writing about it? Definitely not to dwell, stew, or perpetuate drama. I hold no grudges, other than applying Maya Angelou’s philosophy: “When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.” I am writing about it because I was surprised by its sting, which made me empathetic to other adults, and flashed me back to childhood for a momentary connection to the cruelty so many children face on a daily basis. In essence, it reminded me of how crushing bullying is.

I know. It’s February, the month of love. Sometimes it doesn’t matter if you are a Miss, Mrs., or Ms., February can be a tough month to get through. There are so many expectations surrounding Valentine’s Day that many begin to compare their relationships, or lack of relationships, to the unrealistic romantic fiction coming out of Hollywood, or to the love birds who constantly post their never ending happiness on Facebook.

Here’s the good news: This month doesn’t have to be difficult. There are so many aspects of love to celebrate and way more to the whole love thing than just being in a relationship. This year, whether you are involved a great love affair or not, celebrate love for all it can be.

For the most part, I gave up judging people about the same time I gave up perfectionism. When I finally got old enough—actually wise enough—to realize I’m not perfect, nor do I need to be, I also relinquished that expectation of others. With the freedom of being released from the shackles of trying to do right, be right, look right and act right all the time, I learned judging others, just like judging yourself, is usually premature and always unloving. In addition, it is binding to the persons on both sides of the judging.

Like it or not, the New Year is a time to reflect on what went right and what went wrong, and make changes in areas you want to improve upon. New Year’s resolutions get a bad rap, mainly because they’re hard to stick to. If you think about it, resolutions, which are a mission to break an old habit in exchange for a new habit, are set up for failure. The problem lies in unrealistic expectations to change these habits overnight, literally cold turkey. It takes a colossal serving of self-discipline and a whopping amount of will power to instantly change. If we had that kind of determination, we probably wouldn’t have to resolve to change anything.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Oh wait. That was last month. But…it is the most wonderful time of the year to lose weight. I know that’s your New Year’s resolution. I also know 87.3 percent of those who set weight loss as a New Year’s resolution, do not succeed. Why? Well, the real reason is weight loss is a mental game. If you’re not ready mentally, it’s just not going to happen. But this year let’s blame it on something else and take the pressure off. People don’t stick to their weight loss goals because it’s just too complicated and confusing in this day and age.